Published: 2025年4月23日
Word Count: 626

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More 30 Days of Autism Acceptance! Sorry that this one's a little late, school's left me a bit busy and burnt out as of late ^^; (Days 1-5, Days 6-10, Days 11-15)

April 16th: Is loneliness or a sense of isolation something you either currently or in the past struggled with? Is it related to being autistic? What types of things helped you deal with it?
Truthfully, I've never really had actual friends before. Most of the time it doesn't really bother me, but sometimes it can kind of feel like I care more for the people in my life than they'll ever care about me. That's just something I have to cope with on my own, though. I'm not really built for meaningful, lasting relationships.

April 17th: Talk about stimming. In what ways do you stim? Are they vocal stims or physical stims? Do you have any stim toys? Do you tend to hand flap? Have people in the past been upset or annoyed with you for the ways in which you stim? And if so, how did it make you feel and how did you deal with it?
I mostly stim physically. My longest-standing and favorite stim is pacing around on my toes. It's actually something that most people in my family do lol. I also have dermatillomania that causes me to pick at my scalp and skin. It's really gross and embarrassing and I've been berated in the past for disturbing people with it. I've never really been one to hand flap, but I do have a few similar stims that I do when I'm overwhelmingly excited.

As for vocal stims, I never really stim out loud, but sometimes I'll get certain words or phrases "stuck in my head" and will repeat them over and over.

April 18th: Is lying something that's generally hard for you to do? Why? If so, do you tend to avoid lying? Can you usually tell when other people are lying?
In my teenage and adult years I've gotten much better at lying than I was as a child, but I still don't do it much, if only because it doesn't cross my mind to lie in most situations.

My ability to detect when others are lying depends heavily on situational context, and how good the person in question is at lying. Usually I can tell when online posts are written facetiously, if only because I expect people on the internet to lie more often than not.

April 19th: Do you ever feel infantilized by the people in your life? In what ways?
No, not really.

April 20th: Do people ever expect you to be capable of more things than you realistically are? In what ways?
Yes, I have been told to my face "you're an adult, you need to learn how to do this" about things that my autism impairs my ability to do. I think that a lot of people in my life who know that I'm autistic just see it as me being a little odd, rather than an actual disability that leaves me more dependent on others than most adults my age. I've mentioned in one of the previous prompts that my family seems to expect that I'll learn to drive eventually, and that same expectation that I will one day be able to do all of the "normal" things that my peers do extends to most facets of the average neurotypical life course, even if I know that it just wouldn't be plausible for me.

It can be frustrating sometimes, both because it feels like I'm not being heard when I say that it's hard for me to do certain things, and also because it can make asking for help shameful in some situations.